My Complicated Thoughts

This year I want to try and post something on LJ everyday. I want make someone smile everyday. I want to continue working, going to school, and being a good mother. Here goes nothing....

mood: thoughtful

I loved him
He had me wrapped around his finger
Still does
Sometimes I doubt he loves me 
Or ever really did
But either way he has me 
I would do anything to make him happy 
Even if it hurts
I remember how heartbroken I am without him 
And what I do never to feel that again 
It hurts like hell 
....no it is hell
Burning would hurt less then heartbreak 
It would only be physical pain 
Losing him...
Thats physical and mental pain
I could live without him 
I could even manage to smile 
But it probably would be a facade 
It would be fake
It would be full of pain and envy 
Of whoever he does love
But then again
Maybe I'd find another
Who made me feel even more wonderful 
Maybe my pain would be cured 
But most likely
It would be but a bandage 
The damage still there 
Just hidden